Ohhh-Muh-Gawd

NOTE: Toby is tired from dealing with her all day, so this blog will be guest-written by Toby's girlfriend, Denise the Fork!



OOOOOOOHHHHH-MUH-GAWD!

You'll never guess what happened today, ohmuhgawd! I was sleeping early in the morning, and then like, WOW, I like, woke up! And then Toby was all "Good morning, sugarprongs" and I was all "Hey Toby" and we were like, dude, we want some breakfast.

So we ate some scrambled eggs and then I was all "Toby I wanna go shopping" and he was all "Bitch, don't be spendin all my benjamins" and I was all "Toby don't like TALK to me that way or I won't let you watch Three's Company tonight on TV Land" and he was all "Sorry dear, whatever you say."

So like, ohmuhgawd, Toby is whipped like a rented mule. I had to give my best girlfriend Madison The Fork a call to talk about the sit-cha-ation, and Maddy was all "Girl, he don't deserve you" and I was all "Let's drive off a cliff like Thelma and whatsername" and she was all "That's what I would do if he was mah main." But then, like, The Bold and the Beautiful came on and I had to know if Cameron was still sleeping with Morgan (like ohhh-muh-gawd, how could she DO that??), so I forgot about Toby and I went shopping and I bought a nice polka-dotted dress.

But, ohmuhgawd! Toby got home later and he was all "Bitch, what is that?" and I was all "I had to get it, isn't it cute?" and he was all "How much?" and I was all "Does it make me look fat?" and he was all "Bitch, I don't know" and he just rolled his eyes and plopped down on the couch.

And, ohmuhgawd, we watched Three's Company and there was this big misunderstanding and Chrissy almost slept with some mean guy and, OH-MUH-GAWD, we finally went to sleep after that. What a day!!!